MANITOBA'S PROVINCIAL ELECTION: JUDGING THE LEADERS BY HOW THEY PICKLE:

Come next Tuesday at least some of Manitoba, Molly excepted, goes to the polls. The general opinion is that Gary Doer's NDP will cruise into a third term if for no other reason than the fact that their opponents are so obviously bad. Now, Molly doesn't vote even for such an obviously good guy as our local MLA Jim Maloway who has always worked harder and been more honest than the average. Unfortunately no fringe candidate is running in this neighbourhood of a forest of NDP signs. But Molly suggests that a good way to judge the party leaders at least is by what sort of drunk they would be. Molly has personally had her own experience of Gary Doer when she followed him around the Irish Club on St. Patrick's Day trying to buttonhole him into declaring St. Pat's day as an official provincial holiday. A conversation with other club members reinforced her opinion. Mr. Doer is a happy, joyful, sociable drunk without a mean bone in his body.

This is more than can be said for the Conservative leader, Hugh McFadyan. Now Molly can hardly afford the price of high end liquor that Mr. McFadyan probably drinks so she has no direct experience of his alcoholic attitude. The NDP, however, managed to snag a photo of him being an aggressive idiot out of the door of a car that they use in their propaganda, and it really says it all. Neat photo. This character is angry when he is "presumably" sober. God only knows what he is like when he is drunk. The guy practically oozes anger whenever he isn't oozing "sneaky"- some photos of him bear more than a slight resemblance to a weasel. No chubby and cute there. All hard, nasty and vicious. Molly feels sorry for his rich friends who have to deal with him when they hit the Chivas Royale and the $70 bottles of wine. Mcfadyan looks like the sort of person that bars put up the sign "No Knives or Gang Colours" to try and prevent from entering. Without money he'd show up in the 'Most Wanted' list. No wonder he's so prolific at promising to spend other people's money.

Then there's the Liberal leader, John Gerard. He comes across as not capable of being a drunk at all, probably due to a lifetime of weekly sessions of concrete enemas. No fun from him. When the party would be in full swing and polite people go outside to catch a smoke Gerrard would follow them, glass of ginger ale in hand, to give them an extended lecture on the evils of smoking. Nobody could ever get him to shut up short of physical assault. It's the "socially responsible" thing after all. Put this guy in a skirt and he'd be the "Nanny State" personified. Ichhhh !

Looks like Doer gets the "good times vote".